Dear body,
I got news today that you're giving me a hard time still. Please stop being sick asap.
Sincerely,
Me
Well... looks like my thymus gland is enlarged. One possible problem they are really concerned with is cancer. This was the one thing that I didn't want to be a possibility for obvious reasons. 1) I'm freaking 22! 2) I just had my daughter and would love to see her grow up and 3) I don't want to die.
I'm trying not to let their worst case scenario plague my mind but how can it not? I have a daughter now so I worry about all the what ifs. Treatments wouldn't just effect me but her too. I'm just so upset at my health. If its not one thing its another it seems. I'M ALWAYS SICK! I would just like it that for once when one problem is resolved that another wouldn't pop up.
Anyway, I have to call Tricare (my insurance company) Tuesday to schedule the consult with a Thoracic surgeon. Unfortunately the closest one is in Anchorage which is 7 hours away. Depending what they have available though I may need to go to Seattle. The thought of having to do this alone terrifies me. I've never had to see a surgeon unless I was getting surgery. :( I don't want surgery because of the location as well as the recovery. I worry about how all this will effect my daughter. I don't want to be too sick to care for her nor do I want this to effect my breast milk.
I'm completely a mess right now... I'm not going to lie. Oh please just be something easily taken care of. :(
Watching Our Little Girl Grow...
Kaylin Rose Snyder born on 01/01/11 at 7:23pm. She weighed 8lbs 4.5oz and measured 20 inches long. Nothing could have ever prepared me for how much I would love my daughter. I thought I knew what love was when I got pregnant with her, but that was nothing compared to how I now feel. You can't really ever describe what it feels like to become a mother, it's just so amazing. I'm truly blessed to have this little girl and can't imagine my life without her.
Kiki, as soon as I saw this on Adam's FB status last night, I started Googling. It sounds like there could be MANY causes, but I understand why you're freaked out about the worst possible scenario. Try to stay calm (for you and for your gorgeous baby) until you know for sure what's going on. I know -- easier said than done! Everything is going to work out, you just have to take it one day at a time to get through something like this. Keep us all posted and blog as much as you need to to get everything out of your head.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I googled the second they talked to me yesterday and I saw many reasons it could be acting up. I'm hoping their concerns are just because they need to be worried about the worst case scenario and that its not really a possible reason why my thymus is enlarged. I'm eager to talk to the surgeon and see where we go from here so I can get more answers. I just don't like the thought of more tests. Plus any treatment for anything could effect Kaylin if it effects my milk. =\ I just hate health issues now more then ever because I don't want it effecting Kaylin. If I get too sick it effects my ability to care for her and if I cant breast feed it bothers me greatly.
ReplyDeleteJust the other day I was in so much pain that a vicodin and 2 tylenol couldn't even touch it. I had stomach issues too and my zofran and zantac did nothing for it. When that happened I could barely hold her because I kept throwing up and my back hurt holding her. It was ridiculous. So now even a stomach bug upsets me cause I feel bad when I can't hold her when she wants it.
Just frustrated beyond belief that I'm dealing with another issue whether its big or small. Just want to be done with doctors. =\