So emotional.

Warning this post is sad.

Recently one of my good friends sisters experienced pregnancy loss (stillborn). Pregnancy loss is different from miscarriage because it takes place after 20weeks. My heart feels so heavy since hearing the news. She was 11 days behind me in pregnancy and found out last night in the hospital. She had gone in due to fluid leaking. She had concerns a couple weeks before but everything appeared fine at her last appointment. About a week ago she was concerned the baby wasn't moving much but before 28 weeks its not uncommon for movement to be sporadic. Turns out she had every reason to be worried. Last night when they checked the baby to make sure the leakage wasn't effecting her.. they couldn't find the heartbeat. They tried 3 times and were unsuccessful. After performing an ultrasound she was told the baby had indeed died. 2 weeks ago (they can tell by measurements).

I can't imagine how this feels, but knowing what I feel everyday (my baby girl moving) and to suddenly find out she is gone would devastate me.

She decided she would deliver (its that or C-Section) so they induced her. It's now a waiting game to see when she will deliver her little girl. My heart is breaking for her. To make it this far into pregnancy (starting at 24 weeks the chance of survival is 50%.. longer in the better the odds obviously) just to lose your baby has to be an extremely hard thing.

I must admit hearing her story has made me more cautious and aware of everything my baby does. I'm nervous about how much she moves and when. Starting Sunday I will be 28weeks and the fetal kick counts begin. I'll have to see if she kicks 4 times in 1 hour or 10 times in 2 hours. I now know no matter how silly I think it might be.. if my baby doesn't seem to be "acting normal" I will go to Labor and Delivery. I just wish my friends sister got the same chance. Since she was around 23-24 weeks when the baby passed away I'm sure she didn't think it was odd to not feel the baby much. She was concerned but her doctor didn't seem as concerned. I just wish the concerns she expressed were taken more seriously and maybe this could have been prevented.

I hope she can find the strength to make it through this hard time. :(